i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
