try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Randomize
