I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
