to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
