"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
