I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
