So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
