i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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