Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
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We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
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Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
my liver is dry heaving
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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