that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
