Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
