Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize