some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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