Even water is tasting like jack daniels
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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