I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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