Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
