thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
