Moan for me like Helen Keller
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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