Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize