we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
