Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
