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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #

  (816): View more from Missouri

  ah tequila...

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Touche.

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.

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• (516): View more from New York

  i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal

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• (904): View more from Florida

  Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory

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• (386): View more from Florida

  I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.

  (419): View more from Ohio

  At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.

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