Texts From Last Night

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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel like abortions should bother me more

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  (724): I feel like abortions should bother me more http://tfl.nu/zn32
  Replies (32) Good night (1016) Bad night (2603)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?

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  (617): Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money? http://tfl.nu/6pei
  Replies (12) Good night (2757) Bad night (585)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks

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  (303): Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks http://tfl.nu/eae4
  Replies (34) Good night (1035) Bad night (3088)
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  (909): View more from California

  I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.

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  (909): I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars. http://tfl.nu/cj0n
  Replies (39) Good night (798) Bad night (6438)
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  (805): View more from California

  just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.

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  (805): just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/ly75
  Replies (7) Good night (6504) Bad night (1259)
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  (646): View more from New York

  I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"

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  (646): I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive" http://tfl.nu/8zeu
  Replies (19) Good night (1863) Bad night (4092)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???

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  (970): Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas??? http://tfl.nu/mb80
  Replies (32) Good night (5128) Bad night (720)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"

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  (614): Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge" http://tfl.nu/439j
  Replies (20) Good night (3889) Bad night (4483)
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  (562): View more from California

  the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...

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  (562): the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon... http://tfl.nu/do0i
  Replies (94) Good night (20660) Bad night (1907)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.

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  (502): if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords. http://tfl.nu/tyuw
  Replies (9) Good night (909) Bad night (3134)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.

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  (570): I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days. http://tfl.nu/quks
  Replies (42) Good night (5661) Bad night (1475)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.

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  (443): she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help. http://tfl.nu/37hn
  Replies (3) Good night (2248) Bad night (1048)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.

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  (270): Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil. http://tfl.nu/p6d2
  Replies (14) Good night (2209) Bad night (602)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.

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  (412): There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever. http://tfl.nu/yvee
  Replies (12) Good night (3109) Bad night (779)
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  (925): View more from California

  It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.

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  (925): It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day. http://tfl.nu/ynaj
  Replies (5) Good night (1222) Bad night (521)

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