glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
