very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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