I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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