So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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