Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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