His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize