Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
