He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
