My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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