Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I didn't notice because vodka
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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