Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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