He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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