No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
