That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
