Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Randomize
