On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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