Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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