Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
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Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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