In the future we'll all be gay
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
