Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
being pregnant is like rehab
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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