Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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