I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
