i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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