no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
