Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize