doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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