im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
