you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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